- By Nancy Ferguson, Wildwood Resident -
From everywhere: Los Angeles and Ventura Counties but also the San Francisco area and the So. Cal. desert; Colorado, Arizona, Texas, even New York; we hail from all across the USA. Somehow we found our way to this place in the hills of Thousand Oaks. Occasionally it was family who discovered University Village; perhaps friends mentioned it when we talked about “retirement.” Or we wandered here on our own, liked it, and decided to stay. And why wouldn’t we? The surroundings are lovely, the living spaces generous and the available activities numerous. We revel in the concern of the staff; the maids and kitchen workers smile and greet us. The dining room servers, most but not all, students, are friendly, kind and anxious to please. We luxuriate in the knowledge that it wasn’t necessary to depend on our family to make the decision for us to leave our homes of many years nor did we have to look forward with horror at the possibility of needing our children to care for us.
What a cross section of society we represent: veterans of foreign wars, judges, nurses, professors, homemakers, doctors, CEOs, scientists, artists – even an underwater photographer. Common experiences bind us: thoughtless children, parents needing care, a business that we nurtured to success.
Dining with former strangers we hear wonderful, sad, funny stories about the lives we’ve left behind. Some of us wax nostalgic about past histories; some of us are glad to be here where we no longer have to worry about gardens growing sere, mold growing in our closets or the too many rooms, empty since the children left, that need cleaning. We no longer have to lift heavy platters of food at holidays; we now have become the guests of honor in the younger generation’s homes.
We make new friends; we mourn the loss of those who couldn’t stay; we hustle to help any of our new neighbors who need us and we attend meetings to try to keep this refuge as it was intended. We are properly indignant when the food isn’t quite what we would like or the kitchen slows down and we must wait for a meal. But we understand and are content.
Some of us are ill. There is an instant support group, just waiting in the wings to lend a hand – or an ear – if called upon. If we need actual assistance, it’s available. If all we need is an occasional boost – physical or emotional – it’s there for us. We go to movies and lectures, swim, play golf or bridge, exercise, walk, walk, walk and use the “WII” or work the jigsaw puzzle.
Some of us are perpetually cheerful, false cheer perhaps, others cranky and always finding something - perhaps justified - about which to complain. But those of us who are cheerful shrug our shoulders and ignore the complaints or do our best to fix things.
Most of us enjoy living in this “old folk home” where we can entertain our families - or not - join in the activities - or not - and do exactly as we please - because we’ve earned it!